Me and Chaz's Daughter, Lily Angel Brewer was born on October 29th, 2009 at 12:50 pm. She weighed in at 6 pounds 7 ounces, and was 21 inches long. She has a head full of dark brown hair and some beautiful grey eyes (Until they change of course).

My life changed forever that day, not only did I experience the worst pain imaginable that I have ever felt, but I gained some-one so precious and so wonderful that words cant explain how much all the pain was worth it.

I ended up having a c-section after all, because the baby would not budge during the version. I passed out during my c section because the pain was too much for me.. I was very upset that I couldnt see my baby being born or even hear her first cry.. I woke up in recovery screaming at the pushing on my stomache from the nurses..

Im not going to lie, having a baby is soo painful, but the pain is all worth it. She is such a beautiful baby, everything about her is perfect.

Everyones pregnancy and labor is different.. So I just wanted anyone who hasnt been pregnant to know that you are the only one who knows your body well enough to know what kind of pain you can and cannot tolerate. Unfortunately the pain was really harsh on me.

The day I went in, I was already having contractions and did not even know it. They stuck me with my IV and then prepared me for my epidural.. Two pretty painful things already. Then my doctor came in and performed the version.. this is where she placed her hands on my belly and literally forces all of her weight on top of me to get the baby to turn. Lily didnt budge.. therefore I was prepped for a c-section. And I already discussed how that went..

Recovery is rough.. I forced myself to get out of bed and walk and made myself goals to acheieve.. and I did. They told me to walk the hallway at least twice.. well I walked it about 12 to 14 times. Even though the pain was unbearable, I wanted to feel better and make sure I could get better for her. Peeing and pooping.. that was definately a task.. I never knew that peeing and pooping could feel so wonderful after you get the first painful one over with, lol. You really take things for granted sometimes..

One of the nurses had to take my pressure bandage off.. and well.. she ripped my skin off and gave me a pretty deep skin burn.. That was rough.

My belly is stapled and I will be having those removed this Thursday, im really hoping this will be my last part of my pain and then I can finally be relieved from it all..

One amazing thing that came out well was that my milk came in the day after my c-section.. the nurses say that its very rare for even vaginal deliveries to have their milk come in that early... and that I got extremely lucky. She has issues sucking or latching on to my boob.. so I am pumping.. and the nurses told me that im very lucky to have as much milk as I have had for me to supply for Lily. I am able to fill up two bottles worth each time I pump.. Its wonderful! Pumping does not hurt to me.. its actually a relief from where your milk fills up and creates alot of pressure on your boobs.. Im just so happy that I am able to supply her the best kind of food a baby can have.


Anyways, I couldnt be any more happier than to call Chaz such a wonderful father, he has done SUCH an amazing job with Lily and me, and he has just been over the top amazing.. I really could not have asked for anyone better in my life.

Im on the road to recovery and it's only uphill from here.

xoxo
-Tiffany